Daniel West the Host

Host of the show, fan of sports, semi-active Play-by-play announcer, long-suffering Angels fan.

John Beanie The Engineer

Longtime audio engineer who contantly needs to be reminded to actually play the audio.​​

Dave The Producer

Sits in the back, makes jokes, confuses everyone, and produces very little. 

Bagman

The show's biased L.A. sports newsman who feels most alive while ranting about "The Purple Team", or rooting against everything Boston. 

The News Snail

A snail who often delivers breaking news well after it's already been broken. 

The Vegas Golden Hat

A Sentient Hat who makes a sound anytime the city of  Vegas or the Golden Knights get mentioned. ​

The Mailbox

A Mailbox who wastes everyone's time with absurdly long intro music. 
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​Penalty Assessing Robot
A referee robot in charge of catching and punishing of all, mistakes made on the show. Also the founder of the Computer Spreadsheet National Championship, and to our knowledge, the only female member of the show